SF.com

"It's Raining Gay Married People"

By: Jan Aguilos

Posted: 4/28/09

"There's a storm gathering," says one pleasant-looking woman in front of a background of rolling dark clouds and lightning bolts. "And I am afraid," says another pleasant-looking woman.

Of course they're talking about same-sex marriage-as if it was terrorism or the bubonic plague. These statements are made in two ads by the National Organization for Marriage, an advocacy group that was founded in 2007 to oppose same-sex marriage. These ads are part of an announced $1.5 million ad campaign in states such as New Jersey, which are fast becoming battlegrounds.

In early April alone, Iowa and Vermont became the third and fourth states to legalize same-sex marriage-somewhere, Jerry Falwell is spinning in his grave. Massachusetts and Connecticut are the two other states that have legalized gay marriage. For those, like me, who support same-sex marriage, these victories are refreshing in lieu of the passing of Proposition 8 in California in November, a ballot initiative which banned marriage equality in that state.

It's quite probable that New Jersey will join the states that allow same-sex marriage, considering that Governor Corzine has stated that he would sign a bill that legalizes same-sex marriage if one was to ever come out of the state Legislature. Though New Jersey has had civil unions for same-sex couples since 2007, gay rights groups like the Human Rights Campaign and Lambda Legal still consider a civil union inferior to the legal status of marriage.

Even the Final Report of the New Jersey Civil Union Commission, released in December 10, 2008, states that civil unions encourage "unequal treatment of same-sex couples and their children." This report recommended that New Jersey trade in its recognition of civil unions for same-sex couples to the legalization of same-sex marriage.

What's particularly fascinating in Vermont's legalization of same-sex marriage is that it came from legislative means instead of a state Supreme Court ruling, which is what occurred in Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Iowa. This could possibly be a watershed moment in which elected officials gain enough political courage to publicly support marriage equality.

In March, Democratic U.S. Senator Charles Schumer of New York made some news by publicly supporting same-sex marriage. However, he is one of a very small number of national politicians who support same-sex marriage and not just civil unions or domestic partnerships. Even President Obama doesn't support same-sex marriage.

And although, currently, most of the American public is not in favor of same-sex marriage, there does seem to be at least a slow progress in the acceptance of gay rights. A CBS news poll released on April 3 shows that only about one-third of Americans think that same-sex marriage should be allowed. However, that's higher than the 22 percent that thought supported same-sex marriage in a similar 2004 poll.

New Jerseyans seem to be more progressive on the issue than most Americans: a 2008 Zogby poll finds that around 59 percent of New Jerseyans think that the civil union law should be dumped for same-sex marriage. It doesn't mean that marriage equality is inevitable, but it's a really nice glimmer of hope.

Despite the recent victories for same-sex marriage, it is sobering to remember that many states actually ban same-sex marriage. And one of those states is California, a supposedly progressive state. As Jon Stewart said on The Daily Show, "They are now officially more progressive than California… in Iowa!" Who knew?

But here in New Jersey we don't quite yet have same-sex marriage: we have civil unions. Of course, civil unions aren't completely bad, they provide a lot of substantial legal protections but civil unions don't carry the same cultural weight as "marriage." Gay Americans shouldn't be excluded from the legal status of marriage and now there's a storm gathering.

April showers, I guess.